


How the Light Gets In

by sanctuary_for_all



Series: How the Light Gets In [1]
Category: Star Wars - All Media Types, Star Wars Sequel Trilogy
Genre: Feels, First Kiss, Fixed it for you jj Abrams, Love Confessions, M/M, Missing Scene
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-12-20
Updated: 2019-12-20
Packaged: 2021-03-10 20:09:21
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,795
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/21854278
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/sanctuary_for_all/pseuds/sanctuary_for_all
Summary: Finn’s brow lowered, something inside him whispering that this was important. “What did you think I wanted to talk to her about?” (Missing scene from the end of "Star Wars: The Rise of Skywalker.")
Relationships: Poe Dameron/Finn
Series: How the Light Gets In [1]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/1575481
Comments: 57
Kudos: 1415





	How the Light Gets In

**Author's Note:**

> Title from the Leonard Cohen quote.

The Resistance threw open its larders for an impromptu celebration party, digging up music from private collections and clearing space for dancing. A few of the ships who had been part of their interplanetary backup had followed them back to base, and their pilots and crew were welcomed with open arms and invited to join in the celebration.

Of course, that didn’t stop the grieving. Finn’s gaze swept the crowd, picking out the shadowed corners where people were watching the laughter and dancing instead of joining in. Occasionally, people would stop by to check on them, bringing them food or sitting with them for a little while. Everyone could feel the extra empty spaces after the battle against the Sith Fleet, with Leia’s absence aching the most of all.

Still, she would be the first one to say you had to focus on life.

Navigating his way through the crowd, Finn found his own way to the edge and a particular man sitting on an empty crate. “One more rotation and we’re probably good.” He reclaimed his spot beside Poe, handing him the cup of hard cider he’d collected along the way. “Maybe 30 minutes from now.”

“Sounds good to me, General.” Poe took a drink of the cider before handing it back to Finn, voice bright in that way that always meant he was trying very hard not to be sad. “But you know you don’t have to babysit me, right? Feel free to show off your mingling skills.”

“Oh, I am a _master_ of mingling.” Finn took his own drink of the cider, leaning into Poe enough that their arms pressed together. He loved Rey and always would, but it was being with Poe that had really made him start to understand the concept of home. “But I’m happy right where I am, General.”

Finn glanced over just in time to see Poe’s lips curving upward a little, an expression that turned wry an instant later as he caught sight of something in the distance. “You might not feel that way for much longer.”

Finn turned to follow his gaze, sighing inwardly as he caught sight of Rey weaving her way through the crowd toward them. He still didn’t understand how two of the best people he knew could be so damn talented at getting on each other’s nerves, but as long as they were both alive he could deal with it.

Rey came closer, serene in a way she hadn’t been until after the battle. Though she hadn’t wanted to talk about what happened, he could feel that she’d made peace with at least some of the darkness that had haunted her. “Finn, I’ve been looking for you.” She smiled at him, pulling another crate close enough to have her own seat. “You promised you’d tell me that thing you meant to tell me.”

Ah, that. He glanced over at Poe, whose expression had closed off completely at some point in the last few moments. “It’s okay,” Poe said quietly, shifting like he was about to get up. “I’ll leave you two alone for the big confession.”

Finn’s chest constricted painfully, and before he could think it through his hand was on Poe’s leg to hold him in place. “No, stay.” He turned back to Rey, remembering the few quiet conversations he’d had with Leia, and concentrated on pushing the thought outward. _Hi._

Rey’s entire face lit up. “You’re Force sensitive!” She leapt forward, throwing her arms around him. Poe got out of the way just in time, plucking the cup out of Finn’s hands so it wouldn’t spill. “That’s incredible!” Her expression fell as she pulled back. “I’m so sorry I didn’t notice before. I should have—”

“It’s okay.” He caught her hand, giving it a firm squeeze. “You had plenty of other things to worry about. I talked to Leia about it a little, but I don’t even think I’m that strong.”

“You won’t know how strong you are until you start training.” Rey’s expression was firm as she gave his hand a return squeeze. “Which you absolutely don’t have to do if you don’t want to, because you are amazing just like you are. If you do, though, I’d be honored to help. Even if you just want to practice, or want to talk to someone about what it’s like, I’m here for you.”

He’d told himself this was how she’d react, but the confirmation warmed him just the same. “I’m not sure I’m worth the time, what with you being a big powerful Jedi and all.”

She leaned over, pressing a kiss against his cheek. “You’re always worth my time.” She straightened as they all heard Chewie call for her in the distance. “Sorry. There are other people willing to translate, but he says I’m the only one who gets all the technical details right.”

Finn watched her go, BB-8 and D-O catching sight of her in the crowd and following along in her wake. Then he let out a long breath, bracing himself to look over at the man sitting next to him. He hadn’t wanted to talk about his Force sensitivity in front of Poe, mostly because he hadn’t wanted to draw any kind of line between them. Rey’s training was one of the things Poe always complained about, and one of the few things he hadn’t shared with Leia. If he knew Finn was in that category, it might put up a wall between them.

Given how he’d reacted to the entire idea of Finn needing to talk to Rey about something private, it might have already. If he suspected…

But when he did finally glance over, Poe was looking at him with the biggest grin he’d ever seen on the man. “Finn the Jedi. Why am I not surprised?” He nudged his arm. “Learn the rock floating trick for me, okay? I’ve always wanted to see that when I’m not worried about me and everyone else dying.”

Finn just stared at him. “You’re not mad?”

Poe looked at him like he was crazy. “Why would I be mad? Like Rey said, you’re already amazing. This just makes you extra amazing.”

There was the curl of something sharp and sweet in his stomach, familiar enough by now that he could push it aside and focus on the problem at hand. “You weren’t exactly thrilled about me needing to tell her something in the first place.”

Poe’s expression transformed, flashing through surprise and something that looked almost like panic before snapping back to “everything’s fine.” “Ah.” He cleared his throat. “That was just… I was confused.” His gaze slipped away from Finn's. “If I’d known it was about the Force, I wouldn’t have bugged you about it.”

Finn’s brow lowered, something inside him whispering that this was important. “What did you think I wanted to talk to her about?”

Poe hesitated, caught without something to say. “You know what? I didn’t know.” He took a long drink of the cider. “Didn’t have a kriffing clue.”

“But you must have.” Finn took the cup out of Poe’s hand, setting it down on a convenient flat surface before returning his hand to Poe’s leg. He had a sneaking suspicion Poe might consider bolting in a few minutes. “You said you were confused, which means you thought it was something else.”

Poe sighed, closing his eyes. “Can we drop this, please? I am absolutely not drunk enough for this discussion.”

The feeling inside him only strengthened. “No.”

Poe made a sound Finn couldn’t interpret, leaning forward as he scrubbed his hands across his face. “It’s not like you can blame me. ‘I’m about to die’ confessions are usually somewhere along the lines of ‘I’ve always been in love with you.’”

Everything inside Finn went still. “That’s what you thought I was going to tell Rey,” he said quietly. “The thing that bothered you so much.”

Poe hurriedly pushed himself to his feet. “You know what? I think it’s about time I made the—”

Finn grabbed his hand, and Poe immediately stopped moving. He didn’t turn around to look at Finn, his entire body radiating the kind of tension that meant he wanted nothing more than to bolt. But he never tried to pull away, not even when Finn gentled his grip.

It stole Finn's breath. Even Poe making him co-general had seemed like a natural extension of their partnership, the fact that they were always better together than they were apart. But here, now, there was no reason for Poe not to protect himself. No greater purpose it would serve.

Except that Finn had asked.

Heart singing, he gently squeezed Poe's hand. "I do love Rey," he explained. "She knows that."

Poe flinched, but he still didn't try to pull away. "Finn..."

Finn's throat tightened. "But," he continued gently, voice thick with all the emotion rising up inside him. "If I was going to give anyone a traditional 'I'm about to die' confession, it would be you."

Poe went utterly still, like it was his turn to stop breathing. He turned back to look at Finn, so much hope shining out of his face that it made Finn's eyes fill. He was so grateful for their friendship he never would have asked for more, but getting it anyway felt like a precious, impossible gift.

He smiled up at Poe, not bothering to wipe away the tears. "It just never seemed like the right time."

Poe swallowed, his voice rough. "Now seems pretty good."

They moved together, Finn standing as Poe tugged. They let go only to clutch each other, falling into a kiss that had the gravitational pull of suns. It felt like one of those suns was inside him, enough heat and light to bring an entire solar system of planets to life. He'd never felt anything like it before, but one taste and he was already sure he didn't want to live without it.

When they finally broke apart, both of them needing air, Poe looked wrecked in the best possible way. "I may not have mentioned this," he breathed, "but I am _stupidly_ in love with you. I have been for what feels like forever."

Finn grinned, leaning his forehead against Poe's. "In case you need me to actually say it, I'm stupidly in love with you, too."

Poe closed his eyes, fingers curling in Finn's shirt. "That's really nice to hear."

The light was still inside him, so bright he was amazed he wasn't glowing. "It was really nice to say." He lifted his hands to cradle the sides of Poe's face. "Especially since neither of us is about to die."

Poe grinned, leaning in for another kiss. "You always did have the best ideas."

**Author's Note:**

> Come check out my [original fiction,](https://jennifferwardell.wixsite.com/mybooks) my [blog,](http://jennifferwardell.blogspot.com) or say hi to me on [Tumblr](http://sanctuaryforalluniverses.tumblr.com)!


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